Splean Ache

It's funny how everytime I move my fingers, my spleen hurts. Anyway, this is an ongoing project wherein I attempt to type myself to death in the name of [blank].
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Some Guy Left a Voice Mail for Some Other Guy,
Was He Being Strangled?

I probably shouldn’t post this because it has his number in it. It’s just his work number, so maybe he won’t sue me.

But whatever. This message scared me because he sounds like he’s dying and also I don’t know who he’s trying to reach.

I think people should never leave voice mails. They are so awkward and/or creepy.